OC Women is a personal development group for lesbians and women who love
women. Through individual development, reflection and heart-to-heart
discussions, we aim to create a personal oasis – time and space for every
woman who wants to grow to better understand herself, her relationships, and
the community that she lives in.

The fourth run of OC Women will be a ten-session programme commencing in
late January 2010. Women aged 25 years and above are invited to share the
OCW experience.

Please write to ocwomen@oogachaga.com for details.

The original Woodstock Festival took place in 1969 and was later known as a pivotal cultural moment in history. It originated as a corporate venture that brought great artists together in front of a 500,000-strong audience. In 1970, a documentary was made about the music festival. Elliot Tiber, the man who offered the use of his family property to the festival’s organisers, published his story in 2007. Subsequently, Ang Lee (of Brokeback Mountain fame) based his movie Taking Woodstock on Elliot’s memoir.

This, of course, I learnt from Wikipedia. Yes, I am unfortunately quite bereft of music history knowledge and shockingly clueless about the hippie subculture. Fortunately for me, I found the movie quite accessible, and I think that Ang Lee was throwing the net wide, allowing those of us who may not know their pop culture history to have their heartstrings tugged by a simple, human story.

Taking Woodstock is, at heart, the timeless, tireless tale of a young man’s journey. While putting together the music festival, Elliot also finds freedom and courage, and we gradually get to know him, his family, the circumstances surrounding his life and what it could have been like for a gay man growing up in those times. Demetri Martin gives a believable, heartfelt performance as Elliot, so I was surprised to hear that he is mostly known for being a comedian. The entire cast delivers a stellar show, from the excellent Liev Schreiber as the crossdressing Vilma to Elliot’s inimitable parents. The storytelling is fairly well-paced, with a good mix of comedy and drama that keep the slower scenes at the beginning interesting.

With so much going on in the foreground, the actual music of Woodstock becomes mere backdrop. Ang Lee’s Woodstock is far from a documentary about the times, or even about Woodstock itself. I would prefer to call it a portrait of the emotional life of the times. The movie brings home the peripherals of Woodstock, personalising the environment and culture without trying to show what many would call the heart of it – the music. For me it was like a sepia photograph, giving a layer of reality to the sixties without taking the tint of nostalgia from it. This was perhaps the filmmaker’s recognition that no one could capture the grandeur of such a cultural icon.

As a portrait, I thought it was very successful. I caught a glimpse of a bohemian laissez-faire, an idealistic attitude to life that wasn’t afraid of being spiritual, trying new things, being different or just being. The movie shows us the beauty of an era that was ripening into a particular brand of individualism and an increased acceptance of LGBT people in the world.

Taking Woodstock clearly celebrates the hippie culture, although it does raise some possibly problematic issues such as drug and alcohol use. LGBT viewers may also be able to relate to Elliot’s closeted situation and the tug between familial obligation and being true to yourself.

I enjoyed the movie a lot for what it is, a sweet and funny confection that opens up a world of ambiguous promise.

The Abomination of the Blue Hibiscus is a short story by Ovidia Yu, published in the Year’s Best Lesbian Fiction 2008 edited by Fran Walker. She requested that I review the story, whether or not I read the entire book.

Hibiscus is a short, heart-warming story about a lesbian woman and her partner, at her mother’s funeral. Clearly Ovidia seems to love this theme – story actually reminded me quite a bit of the story she wrote a couple of years ago and read at our Indignation event, Tall Tales and Short Stories, called Pierced Years. Personally, I much preferred Pierced Years to Hibiscus, though both are valuable contributions to the corpus of Singaporean lesbian literature.

But what makes this story different is the closetted homophobic maiden aunt character that is more central than the couple themselves. The character was quite obviously inspired by a “well-loved” persona, and quite hateable in her portrayal, but with a resigned acceptance of her place in the family. Having said that, I found the characterisation too much of a caricature, and perhaps it could have been toned down a little, made more subtle. I also much loved the way blue hibiscuses were used in the story.

Hibiscus stands out for its layered family relationships laced with shades of acceptance.  While not Ovidia’s best work, the story is readable. I had a chance to read some of the other stories at random (but not the entire book), and I can say the stories are not too bad – some of them are cliche and sometimes centres too much on the lesbian identity, but as a collection, it is worth having on your bookshelf.

Year’s Best Lesbian Fiction 2008 is available at Books Actually.

Have you booked your seats for The Blue Mansion?

The Blue Mansion

Don’t miss the special screening of Glen Goei’s latest film The Blue Mansion on 15th October. It’s a fundraising premiere and the net proceeds will go to AWARE.

Don’t miss the special screening of Glen Goei’s latest film The Blue Mansion on 15th October. It’s a fundraising premiere and the net proceeds will go to AWARE.

There will be a pre-movie cocktail reception where you can meet Glen and members of his cast. They include Lim Kay Siu, Adrian Pang, Neo Swee Lin, Emma Yong, Claire Wong, Tan Kheng Hua, and Huzir Sulaiman.

Remember to bring your business card because there will be a business card draw and you could win a 4-hour cruise valued at $3,000, with soft drinks and snacks, for 10 people on this yacht.

Buy a block of 20 seats and you will get:
A token of appreciation from Glen
A photo session with Glen and the cast members.
If your company buys blocks of 10 or 20 seats, we’ll put your company’s logo on our webpage and other material.

Get all the sponsorship details here.
Event details:
Date: Thursday 15th October
Venue: GV Grand 6, Great World City
(Cocktail reception at the Garden Terrace)
Time: 7.30pm

Price: Tickets are $50 each (Tax deductible)
Book your seats now – send email to bluemansion@aware.org.sg or call Rina at 6779-7137

Note from the editors: In the recent weeks, we published a review of the book No More Daddy’s Little Girl by Karen Lee. That review generated much heated discussion by people on both sides of the camp about the merits of the book. In order to give our readers both sides of the story, we are a publishing a reader-submitted review offering a different view from the previous. Neither reviews are indicative of Sayoni’s official view in any way.

This guest writer goes by the name of Jane Jones.

Two weeks ago, a friend handed me No More Daddy’s Little Girl, after we had casually discussed the one official review posted so far and some negative opinions by our mutual acquaintances. I had not been inclined to read the book when I first heard of it, as I had the notion that autobiographies ought only to be written by people of special interest or distinction, with something important to address and educate others about. Coming out stories are a dime a dozen, and ordinary people tend not to write an entire autobiography on this selling point alone. Curiosity began to replace vague disinterest. Are the review and opinions accurate or justified? It was only fair that I read the book and decide for myself. And so over the weekend, I did.

From reading the blurb and proud declaration that it is the first local lesbian autobio, I had expected this book to illuminate me on how Karen discovered herself vis-a-vis her sexuality and came out in the end (no pun intended) triumphant over the obstacles in her way to lead a life with love and acceptance from her faith, family, friends and herself. I expected that most of the life experiences recounted in her book would be in respect of this, her discovery and journey of being lesbian. Unfortunately, I have to conclude that the book failed to deliver on these expectations.

Date: Wednesday, 30 September 2009

Time: 21:00 – 23:00

Location: Shaw Lido 1 (Shaw Centre, Scotts Road)

Fridae presents the Taking Woodstock Fundraising Gala Premiere in Singapore on Sep 30. 100% of ticket sales will go towards funding gay-related community projects.

Directed by Academy Award-winning director Ang Lee (who brought us what were to become gay classics The Wedding Banquet and Brokeback Mountain), Taking Woodstock is based on the memoirs of a young gay man Elliot Tiber (Demetri Martin). Tiber, then a struggling young interior designer in New York City, had recently returned to his parents’ rundown motel in the Catskill Mountains when he heard that a planned concert had lost its permit from the neighbouring town of Wallkill. He then called producer Michael Lang (Jonathan Groff) at Woodstock Ventures providing a much-needed performance permit and offering his motel as the production headquarters.

The 1969 Woodstock Music and Arts Festival, which attracted 500,000 people, turned out to be one of the most iconic events of the hippie generation and is today widely regarded to be one of the greatest and most pivotal moments in popular music history.

100% of ticketing proceeds will go towards funding gay-related community projects.

Since 2005, Fridae has organised six movie-fundraisers raising over S$60,000 in benefit of a variety of NGOs including Action for AIDS, AWARE, Cat Welfare Society; two independent short films by Boo Junfeng and Loo Zihan; and Indignation – which Fridae has financially and in other ways supported since it was first held in 2005. Pink Dot, the first-ever official LGBT public gathering held in May 2009 in Singapore, was also a beneficiary of Fridae’s Milk Fundraising Gala Premiere held earlier this year.

Date: 30 Sep 2009 (Wednesday)
Time: 8 pm (Reception for VIPs from 7 pm)
Venue: Shaw Lido 1 (Shaw Centre, Scotts Road)
Tickets: USS$7 (Zuji Promotion) / US$10 (Standard) / S$50 (VIP*)
* VIP Tickets include goodie bags, pre-show reception and premium seats.

Ticketing and more info: http://www.fridae.com/takingwoodstock/

“No More Daddy’s Little Girl”- a book by Karen Lee.

Before i read Karen Lee’s book, i received plenty of� comments pertaining to it.
Most of them were negative, criticizing aspects from grammar and style of writing to content.

I bought the book anyway, complete with her autograph on it. You never know till you read it, i thought to myself. Besides, i believe in supporting the first Singaporean lesbian autobiography. In the same train of thought [to support local queer writings], i bought the Chinese publication “tong lei” by OC. I finished the book in a couple of days, snatching moments before bedtime and during dinnertime.

The first half of the book touched on her early crushes, with a heavy emphasis on her involvement in Girls’ Brigade. Parts of the book provided information in somewhat random chunks. Sometimes the pieces were too brief to comprehend in detail. A characteristic, i surmised, as a result of length constraint. After sharing childhood memories, the story segued into her stints in Australia, Sweden and eventually Canada.

The greatest criticism was probably on content. Someone commented that the book is screwed up because Karen implied that she is gay as a result of being molested in her childhood. Indeed, in her coming out email to her parents, the uncanny pairing of the coming out declaration with the molest incident hinted at perceived causality. The person went on to say that the book gives fundies ammunition to target the lesbian population: you are gay because you are screwed up in your childhood. It was also pointed out that the book reflects badly on romantic relationships in the community. You can imagine a fundie going “look at how many flings Karen had! This is evidence that lesbian relationships are unstable.”

“She’s probably a screwed up lesbian,” was the concluding remark.
Coupled with Karen’s continuous struggles with reconciling her faith and sexuality throughout the book, it’s easy to see why some do not find the book uplifting.

But there were little entertaining bits here and there that amused me greatly. Karen’s ego and narcissism had me guffawing. Her confidence exuded from the very pages. She declared her own leadership, discipline and attractiveness. The audacity of demanding for someone’s girlfriend was appalling and amusing at the same time. In retort to any reader’s immediate question “how can you do that? She’s attached!”, Karen’s justification was one of standing up for her affections.

The book has several ingredients for a grabbing piece: horrifying incidents [e.g., lesbian almost-stabbing drama], the agony of being at odds with God, love, fleeting attractions, sex, eventual familial acceptance and so on. It’s certainly not a boring piece. No More Daddy’s Little Girl sent me through a torrent of emotions, ranging from exasperation to amusement. I raised my eyebrows, rolled my eyes, laughed and melted. I felt like i was sitting down with an acquaintance over coffee, listening to her life stories. Somewhat conversational [which might explain the writing style/grammar/sentence structure].

As i put the book down, sweetness overflowing from the last chapter on familial acceptance, i mulled over the merits and demerits of the book. Yes, i agree the book does not help the current negative stereotypes of lesbian women in Singapore. Yes, it is sad that people still attribute homosexuality to some childhood mishap. And certainly, it is rather sobering that some people cannot reconcile their sexuality and faith. But the book is about Karen’s working paradigm of her sexuality, spirituality and the world. Some lesbian women do think in such and such a way.

I define an autobiography as a life story worth a read.

As an autobiography, i think No More Daddy’s Little Girl has delivered.

————————————-

A short note from Karen:

“No More Daddy’s Little Girl” is an autobio written by Karen Lee. The book is available nationwide at most major bookstores such as Borders Whee Lock, Kinokuniya (Ngee Ann City & Bugis Junction), MPH (Novena, Robinson Road,Raffles City and CityLink mall), Select Books @ Tanglin Shopping Centre and Oohtique. Also 24 POPULAR bookstore branches. Do pick up a copy to support me! Thank you!

Editor’s Note: Please note that this review is the author’s personal opinion and does not reflect the official position of Sayoni in any way.

“No More Daddy’s Little Girl”- a book by Karen Lee.

Before i read Karen Lee’s book, i received plenty of comments pertaining to it.
Most of them were negative, criticizing aspects from grammar and style of writing to content.

I bought the book anyway, complete with her autograph on it. You never know till you read it, i thought to myself. Besides, i believe in supporting the first Singaporean lesbian autobiography. In the same train of thought [to support local queer writings], i bought the Chinese publication “tong lei” by OC. I finished the book in a couple of days, snatching moments before bedtime and during dinnertime.

The first half of the book touched on her early crushes, with a heavy emphasis on her involvement in Girls’ Brigade. Parts of the book provided information in somewhat random chunks. Sometimes the pieces were too brief to comprehend in detail. A characteristic, i surmised, as a result of length constraint. After sharing childhood memories, the story segued into her stints in Australia, Sweden and eventually Canada.

The greatest criticism was probably on content. Someone commented that the book is screwed up because Karen implied that she is gay as a result of being molested in her childhood. Indeed, in her coming out email to her parents, the uncanny pairing of the coming out declaration with the molest incident hinted at perceived causality. The person went on to say that the book gives fundies ammunition to target the lesbian population: you are gay because you are screwed up in your childhood. It was also pointed out that the book reflects badly on romantic relationships in the community. You can imagine a fundie going “look at how many flings Karen had! This is evidence that lesbian relationships are unstable.”

“She’s probably a screwed up lesbian,” was the concluding remark.

Yesterday Sayoni organised a forum titled �United We Fall, Divided We Stand?� for Indignation. For those who could not make it, the event was covered live on our twitter. We reproduce the report here for you. We also would like to take this opportunity to thank all the people who made this event possible – photo/videographers, ushers, receptionists, logistics, voluntweers, and just anyone who helped out from the conception of the event to the execution.

I attended a Sayoni forum last Saturday entitled “Are We There Yet?”*

The forum covered the many inequalities that queer women suffer in comparison to heterosexuals, with reference to the 2008 Sayoni Survey Report. The AWARE saga was mentioned fairly frequently and prompted many from the floor to speak up to buttress or disagree with the panellists’ ideas. There were words of encouragement, a discussion on what action we can and should take, the injunction to come out as gay; just to mention some issues that struck me most. The floor was very opinionated and passionate, with not a few male voices, including Alex Au’s.

At one juncture, there was a split between the pragmatic and the idealistic approach to gay activism (using the latter term in a broad sense). Someone opined that we need to teach teenagers how to differentiate real feelings of attraction from puppy love; that is, how to tell that her same-sex attraction is just a phase or not. Alex Au disagreed, saying that we should not need to discriminate in the first place, that there should be nothing wrong with experimentation. Another member of the floor argued that we need to be realistic about this.

After the forum, some of us got together. In the conversation that ensued, I had a strong sense of the difficulties that we face in our everyday lives. I think that each one of us, if we really go out and about, getting in touch with ground sentiment, are going to meet with a lot of resistance. That resistance is going to be hurtful. The environment we are in isn’t very kind or forgiving. (I believe that many will beg to differ on this point, and yes, it is relative.)

However, the impact others can have really depends on the individual’s tolerance level, and, secondarily, how we choose to react to an action. I’m not saying I need to be able to take abuse. The way sensitivity works, if we understand the root causes of an emotion and are able to step back sufficiently from our trapped, subjective selves and have an underlying source of security, I think we can achieve a certain amount of freedom from the worst of hurts.

I think we need to be clear of where we stand, that it is perfectly okay to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered: anything but heterosexual and cisgendered. Sure, the science is fuzzy, the religious texts are difficult, and most of the time, there is very little certainty. But that’s okay. We are not meant to understand life thoroughly and pin it down to basic principles. Science, too, cannot illuminate everything. We need to build rafts for ourselves and one another and create that connectedness and rationality.

Frankly, I may just be building bunkers against assaults or trying to erect a bridge in my head between the different approaches to advancement of the cause. In truth, different ways of regarding the topic are necessary and even fundamental to any kind of change, either top-down or bottom-up.